Archive for January, 2011

January 29th, 2011

GMDL Day 8: What’s Your Story?

Last Friday, I took the opportunity to rest after I had Lasik surgery. But while my eyes took in some much needed slumber, I used the time to catch up on all the webinars and audio recordings that I had been too “busy” to listen to in the past. It was a blessing and I hope to share what I learned with you.

Two Lessons

In one webinar, hosted by the Savvy Freelancer’s Lexi Rodrigo interviewed Pamela Slim, author and blogger of Escape from Cubicle Nation, I learned about one woman’s jump from the chaos of corporate life to pursuing her dream of working for herself.

In another, I was inspired by the importance of telling a story. So I will tell you mine.

In 2000, I graduated with my BA in English. I laughed when I saw Avenue Q and heard this song. It’s exactly where my state of mind was at the time.

There was no way in heck I thought I could truly make a living as a writer, so I took whatever job came my way. This led to everything from secretary, administrative assistant, communications assistant to a private investigator.

Although I didn’t know it at the time, there was a part of me that hadn’t completely died when I pushed away my desires to be a writer inside. I still wrote poetry and submitted newspaper articles every once in awhile. And surprisingly, a handful were published. But I just didn’t think I could really do it, so I pushed on.

Pushing on from one job I dislike to another was fun as a novelty for awhile. But after I got into my thirties, repetitive jobs, jobs I was bad at, just didn’t work for me anymore.

A Turning Point

The turning point was when a supervisor continually commented on my one strength – my data entry skills.

IF typing and entering numbers were my slice of heaven. If doing so made my heart sing, then I would have been happy where I was. But I was resentful, upset and disappointed in myself. I knew I was not fulfilling my purpose and lifting my spirit up. I was settling and you can only do that for so long before it begins to wear on your heart.

{photo by: So Sylvie}

I wish I could say I stopped fooling around and started writing. But it took a few more years before I had the courage. And even after I reached my dream and worked as a professional copywriter for a retail company, I still didn’t feel content.

I realized that my purpose wasn’t to be an administrative assistant or to work at a 9-5 job serving a boss or a company. While I admire those who work hard and do so, it just didn’t feel right to me. My purpose was to work for myself so that I could freely help and serve the needs of others.

At first, this directed me into the role of therapist. I went to graduate school and obtained a degree in Marriage and Family therapy. But a few years in, I knew I was fulfilling someone else’s dream. After I graduated, I said good-bye with trepidation over a decision that would leave me thousands of dollars in debt and further from where I had started.

For a little while, I went back to what was safe. I needed to pay the bills so I took another freelance job for a big computer company with the same name as a fruit.

Instead of feeling happy, I felt more in despair than ever before. I knew this was it. Either I wised up and at least attempted to fulfill my dream as a writer or I would forever be jumping from job to job unhappy and confused.

Finally in 2009, I GOT IT!

I left all sense of sensibility, practicality and every other adjective my parents wished were as important to me, and I took a BIG leap.

Happy to Be in Freelancing

I have been freelance writing ever since and I am happy to be doing so. While it is never an easy path, it is the one that feels like my piece of the pie. If I have any regrets, it is that I wasted time getting here.

It is a long-winded story. But it is my story of how I got more (my life, my heart, my passion) back by doing less (struggling with what is, applying for jobs that didn’t fit).

What’s your story?

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January 28th, 2011

GMDL 7: Reflection

Another week has passed. We’re 7 days in…

How are you holding up?

Are you finding that doing less is harder than you expected?

Do you find yourself feeling guilty, worried, anxious when you skip things on your to-do list?

Or are you reading this and still haven’t stopped doing a thing?

As we end the week, I hope you will take the time to reflect on where you are at now. Are you resisting change? And if so, why are you resisting it? What parts of your schedule do you find hardest to give up?

This will be a short post, but I’m leaving you with two gifts to end the week.

{photo by: stevendepolo}

1. This is a story taken from Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life by Judith Orloff.

A chief is talking to his tribe about two dogs inside his mind: one a white dog that is good and courageous, the other a black dog that is vengeful and angry. Both dogs are fighting to the death. A young brave, unable to wait for the end of the story asks, “Which one will win?” The chief responds. “The one I feed.”

At the end of the challenge, whatever you give the most attention to will grow. If you feed the good side of you that wants to rest and enjoy life, that part of your life, the life you desire will increase. If you neglect it and feed your constantly busy schedule and your uber busy life, your busyness and discontent will grow. The question is what do you want most for your life?

2. I found this wonderful website called Accomplishing More by Doing Less.

Not only is this a great resource for the challenge, but it also offers a free e-book on the subject.  To get it, click on the icon to the upper left of the website that says Office Zen. It’s a pdf and you don’t need to give out your email address to get a free copy. Yay!

Well my friends, that’s it for the first week of the challenge. Thank you for your support on Twitter and Facebook! You inspire me to keep getting better and better. See you all next week!

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January 27th, 2011

GMDL Day 6: Holding Back

{photo by: Emily Elisabeth Photography}

I might have mentioned once that I work for a site called Psych Central. It’s a wonderful company to be a part of and I am proud to be an Associate Editor. One of the joys I get from working there is getting paid to read the wealth of articles written there.

Holding Back Who We Are

One article in general really got me excited. It was about how we hold back. We hold back who we are out of fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of being judged. We hold a part of our true selves close to our heart, so no one can see it, ridicule it or take it from us.

It sparked something in me when I read that.

I wonder how much of us are locking up who we really are.

Questions to Ask Yourself:

When you are writing an article, a blog post, a new chapter in your book, are you hiding behind your true words?

When you are chatting with a friend or interacting with a co-worker, are you holding back the best of you in fear of others finding out?

There once a girl who hid behind her words. She through them fast on the page and hid quickly so no one would see her. She pretended to be fine when she was not. She was silent about her real dreams and passions. She was safe. But her talent was undiscovered. She was a gift that no one else knew about.

Is that girl you?

Part of the challenge is to gain more than we are willing to sacrifice. It’s gaining freedom to be who we are by not spending the time and energy being who we are not.

Don’t hold back your feelings when someone asks you. Don’t censor yourself when writing up that post.

Open your heart to the possibility of who you are. Whether you are writing or talking to a loved one, take a chance and be yourself. You may be pleasantly surprised by the results.

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January 26th, 2011

Day 5 GMDL Challenge: An Eye Opener

{photo by: doug88888}

This post is late!

What’s my excuse?

I’m doing less. And it’s working.

Last night I decided to skip the blog post, the late night work, the essay that still needs editing and my husband took me out for some much needed Pinkberry instead.

Did I lose my job?

Did my world fall apart?

Did my dreams go down the toilet with my to-do list?

Nope. I’m still here and all is well.

In fact, I feel a lot more hopeful than yesterday. Because I survived one hurdle and now I’m on to the next.

For today’s challenge, I dare you to do one less thing. Try it and let me know what happens. You may be surprised, like I was, by the outcome.

Like my Get More By Doing Less Challenge series? Don’t miss a day of the challenge. Get tips sent straight to your email by signing up here.

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January 25th, 2011

GMDL Challenge Day 4: Get Real

I bet some of you are wondering how the heck you are supposed to do less when you can barely get by doing the stuff you are doing now.

I can already hear you saying to me, “Get real! I have a life. I have things I NEED to do. There is no way I can drop things off my list.”

I hear you. I wonder it too. But when I think about the consequences, I think reconsidering that to-do list is worth doing.


Here’s where we get real:

{photo by: massdistraction}

  1. Spend some time thinking about what YOU really want for your life.
  2. Think backwards about the steps you need to do to get it.
  3. Then, reorganize your to-do list in terms of priorities.
  4. If you need to go grocery shopping and pick up the mail, see if you can combine all of your going out errands at one time.
  5. For one week, right down exactly what you do and how long it takes to do it. Then, see how much time you are REALLY spending doing everything.
  6. Schedule in time for yourself, every day, and make it AS important as the other things on your list.
  7. Start questioning your to-do list. Pretend you are your own personal assistant. Better yet, imagine you are the assistant of a big fancy star like Oprah. Sometimes it helps to imagine you’re working for someone else. Then, think about what you can cut down so that they (you) have more time to do the things they (you) want to do.
  8. Begin accepting failure and disappointment. When you start getting out of events, responsibilities, tasks that you don’t want or need to do, people will be upset with you. Let them. Practice what THAT feels like.

Making changes in your life is not easy. It might feel near impossible right now. That’s  normal. It will feel like climbing a great hill at first, but with time it will flow into the rhythm of your life. If you let it.

Good luck!

As always, I would love to receive feedback from how you are doing and get and give support along the way. Please tweet, comment and share the challenge with those you love.

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January 24th, 2011

Here’s My Secret…

{photo by: thefost}

I’ve been debating whether to divulge my secret. But holding in secrets is not good for your health and I hope that sharing what I’m going through may help others as well. Especially, since this is Thyroid Awareness Month.

A few months ago, I was diagnosed with thyroid disease.

Surprisingly, that little butterfly shaped gland in your neck has a lot of power.

It affects your brain, your hormones, your heart rate, your metabolism, your muscles, your body temperature, your energy level, your hair, etc.. Almost anything you can imagine actually.

Not only does it make you tired.

It makes you weak.

It plays with your hormones.

A lot of people have it. It’s usually in women and if you are 35 and older should ask to be tested.

But this is not a blog post entirely about thyroid disease. What it is is a reminder about how to stick to your goals.

If you’re on this challenge with me, you may be tired, burnt out or just trying to find more meaning in your life. If so, then this challenge will definitely help you get there.

Being sick, having your physical health compromised whether temporarily or permanently, or losing someone you love (furry friend or human friend) makes you rethink your goals. The gift is that it puts life in perspective.

It’s hard to imagine what we can do to our bodies when we’re healthy. We feel invincible that we can work it as hard as our mind can go.

I can tell you where I was in 2009 is a lot different than where I stand today.

I used to believe that my body was too slow for my mind and I willed to go faster, faster so that I could get more things done in a day. I can’t say for sure if stress caused my illness. But it probably did not help it.

If I could go back in time, I might have told myself what I am telling you now. Don’t take your health for granted. You can always get another job, home or become famous and successful. But some things in life cannot be reversed.

While it’s important to have dreams (I am after all a BIG believer in dreams!), it’s always good to put them in light of our whole self.

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Is working past midnight every night worth the sacrifice it will take to our physical bodies?
  • Will I one day regret all of the time I am spending making money instead of enjoying my life?
  • IS ___________ more important than me, my health or my family?

The next time you’re stuck with a tough decision or contemplating how far you should take your career, reflect on them. Decide if it’s worth it and if you are willing to sacrifice the potential consequences if it is not.

If you are on the Get More by Doing Less Challenge, would love your support. Please tweet, comment below and share your story about the challenge with us.

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January 21st, 2011

GMDL Challenge Day 2

It’s Friday. And when you’re on a mission to G.et M.ore B.y D.oing L.ess, Friday is THE time to do less. It’s the end of the week, it’s time to unwind.

So drop what you’re doing. Forget about the shopping list. Take 5 and embrace the moment.


Then, read these articles I have been collecting for you over the week.

1. Following a challenge can be a bit tricky can’t it? Sometimes it feels like you are forever and a day away from your goals. You’re here (chaotic city, desperate, busy) and you want to be there (at peace). But it takes the in between (patience) to get across the bridge. So maybe you need HOPE. Hope is imperative on the journey. Hope is not denial. It is not unrealistic wishing. It is the belief that you will find your way even when there is no way in front of you. To increase it, this Beliefnet post should assist you on the journey.

2. My hope for you is that you will learn to start doing less and gaining more by doing so. It’s a challenge, a mission, a temporary state that will hopefully encourage you to change your entire life. I found a blog called Be More With Less that is devoted entirely to this subject and I invite you to read it. May it help you start to transform your life.

3. Last year, I wrote a post for Problogger founder Darren Rowse’s new blog Feelgooder.com. It was called 5 Steps to Transform Your Life. I wrote it with fire, passion, a strong belief that I could inspire others to make positive changes in their life. If you read it, I hope it will give you the courage to pursue your dreams. I hope you will read it and realize that possibilities exist where you once saw roadblocks.

4. Creativity. Creativity is key to living a more meaningful life. Creative expression allows are unconscious to flow through without the limitations of our conscious, critical mind. You do not need to be Van Gogh or Picasso to pick up a paint brush or to write a poem. You only need to be open and non-judgmental and to do it with fire, as if nothing else mattered. If you’re having trouble getting started, read these 10 Ways to Unleash Your Creativity, another Beliefnet favorite. And download a free inspiring e-book on how crafts can change your life by Guideposts.

5. True Refuge. If you’re fighting against doing less, there may be a deep, underlying reason why. Maybe it’s hard for you to have compassion with yourself. Maybe there is something telling you that you don’t deserve to take care of yourself  or that busyness = self-worth, importance, a successful life. This free audio recording with Tara Brach, author, clinical psychologist, and the founder and senior teacher of the Insight Meditation Community of Washington, may help you banish and get to the root of and heart of the problem.

That’s it! Easy right. Good luck and let me know how you’re doing on this second day of the GMDL challenge.

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