Creatively inspiring you to follow your dreams.

Month: June 2011

Nurturing Your Soul

Nurturing Your Soul

Tweet {photo} You know that most of the time bloggers write what they know about right? Or they blog about what they are going through. So when I say, “nurture your soul,” I’m confessing that I’ve been known to neglect this vital nugget of truth. […]

Getting the Courage You Need to Fulfill Your Dreams

Getting the Courage You Need to Fulfill Your Dreams

Tweet {photo} What is courage? I can start by telling you what it’s not. It’s not sitting on your couch day after day willing your dreams to become a reality. It’s not taking class after class as a way to stall action. It’s not resistance, […]

Cultivating Confidence

Cultivating Confidence

{flickr photo}

I remember the exact day it happened. It was April 26, 2011. It was a Tuesday, and an ordinary one at that. Except for one thing.  I went to the gas station that afternoon and I said, “$50 on number 8.” There was no hesitation in my request. There was not a slightest high pitch, lilt at the end of my statement. For the first time in my life I was confident in what I was asking.

Just weeks earlier I was apologizing profusely when I had to stop working from a serious bout of food poisoning. In between bathroom breaks, I continued to work on my laptop. Months before that I questioned the validity in ending a relationship with a client who went from benign to ballistic in mere months.

I often got confused as a teenager when calling people on the phone. When I was 25 years old a classmate who I hadn’t seen in years asked me what I was doing for a living. I mumbled, “Loaned Executive.” I was quite proud of it actually, but I was too embarrassed of my pride to spit out the words. This was the result of years of grooming. Never stand too high among the grass. Better to hide than to stick out. Better to blend in with the crowd than to rise above it. But something changed. I went from 13 to 33 in six months.

What sparked this spontaneous bout of confidence?

It took my entire life, but I realized that to live my dreams, not just dream them I needed to strip away at every thought and belief I had about myself. I had to leave the inner critic on the wayside. I needed to rise about the limitations that kept me bounded with fear for so long.

In a few words, I learned to have the courage to be me.

 

How do you cultivate your own self-confidence?

  • Begin focusing on your passion. Read books that fill that need. Attend lectures, workshops. Find people who share that passion with you. When you are filled with what moves you, your confidence will rise to the top.

  • Fake it until you make it. Everyone starts from the bottom. Until you have the confidence that comes from experience, act as if you do. Act as if you already believe you have the skills, talent, and years to back up your career. You may surprise yourself and realize you already do.

  • Communicate with confidence. Everyone experiences a lack of self-confidence at one time or another. Maybe it’s the weight you gained or your inexperience that has you lacking the big C. I find that if I focus on the person in front of me instead of on myself, insecurities and fear fades and my confidence soars.

  • Confidence comes from self-worth. Like a flower that needs care, it’s important to spend time growing your self-esteem. Keep a daily success journal with all the things you have accomplished in a day. Reflect on moments where you surprised yourself and achieved great things. Be kind and compassionate to yourself. Nurture your inner spirit by learning to trust your instincts and respect your decisions.
  •  

    Remember that cultivating confidence takes time. Remember that you cannot buy it with fancy clothes. Remember that confidence comes from an inner strength of being not outward actions to impress others.

    Today, I heard a talk on love. The person asked, “What if you were to love yourself just the way you are?”

    If you can begin to practice doing that, you will exude confidence effortlessly. For confidence doesn’t just come from what you wear and how you shake someone’s hand. It comes from the belief that you are worthy of success and happiness and by believing in yourself and your endeavors.

    Pretty powerful stuff!

    What did it take for you to cultivate your own sense of self-confidence?

    Share this:
    Share this page via Email Share this page via Stumble Upon Share this page via Digg this Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter
    Finding the Answers to Your Questions With Life Coach Mary Welty-Dapkus

    Finding the Answers to Your Questions With Life Coach Mary Welty-Dapkus

    Tweet Martha Beck certified life coach Mary Welty-Dapkus has walked the walk. She consults others in her coaching business Set in Motion because she has not only been through the program, but she’s gone and dealt with the hard parts of life herself. From a […]

    5 Simple Steps to Creating Your Dreams

    5 Simple Steps to Creating Your Dreams

    Tweet guest post by: Karin Volo We often have a way of making things more complicated than they need be. It is often the simplest things in life that bring us the most joy. That’s why when I was recently asked,” How do you create […]

    Follow That Passion

    Follow That Passion

    {photo}

    I’ve been thinking about what makes people successful. What moves them, for example, to a place of uncertainty to living the life of their dreams?

    Writing for magazines and newspapers gives me the opportunity to find out answers to questions like these. And here’s the most interesting part. Although there did seem to be planning and hard work involved, the key to most people’s success has been PASSION.

    Can you believe that?

    Yes it was true for the store owner who played an instrument all his life and ended up decades later teaching kids how to play it. And it was true for Mary Cvetan, a PR writer and editor who created an organization out of nothing, but an idea.

    I interviewed her for Rabbits USA magazine as the co-founder of Pittsburgh House Rabbit Club. However, Cvetan didn’t spend a lifetime as a rabbit lover and then suddenly decided one day to start an organization focused on rabbit education and advocacy. Instead, she fell in love with one rabbit and followed her PR instincts to bring her idea into fruition.

    It Started With Loving One Bun

    Ten years ago, Cvetan had a friend with two rabbits. They both lived in an outdoor hutch, not a great place for a prey animal by the way.

    Here’s her story:

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “My friends had a 8 foot privacy fence around the property. The hutch was custom built. It was very close to the home. That rabbit was in absolutely no danger at all. But she didn’t know that. All she knew was that this dog was barking ferociously. She panicked. She threw herself against the side of the hutch trying to escape and she broke her back.”

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    That poor bunny died that night.

    Although Cvetan didn’t have very much bunny experience, the story touched her and when her friend asked her to keep Jaja, the remaining girl bunny who witnessed her mate’s tragic death, she said, “Yes.”

    Cvetan told Jaja, “Look. You will never be in a cage again. You’re going to meet me half-way. We’re going to figure this out together.” And that they did. In fact, she fell so much in love with this little bun that she told everyone she met about her. She talked to people in the grocery store and at the vet. And the more people she talked to, the more she realized the lack of information there was on how to adequately care for a rabbit.

    Her conviction to use her skill as a writer to spread education about rabbits led to an essay published in a local newspaper. That article received a lot of attention from rabbit owners in different states. It fueled Cvetan to do more and around Easter in 2002, she reached out to her local humane society and offered to give them free PR help. She wanted to help the organization receive media attention to get rabbits adopted at Easter and more importantly provide information so that individuals could make a good decision about whether they should even adopt rabbits at all.

    After that year’s success, Cvetan came up with more ideas on how to increase adoption rates and education on rabbit care. They had an adoption event at Borders the next year. And then she began fostering a rabbit.  She said, “So little by little, I was getting more and more volunteer fever for the rabbits and for the shelters advocacy.”

    A few years later in 2005, the education director at the Humane Society asked Cvetan if she would like to partner with the organization and create an education program. Six years later, Cvetan’s club the Pittsburgh House Rabbit club is as busy as ever.

    Like a frog jumping from one lily pad to the next, Cvetan seemed to follow what called her in the moment, going from one idea to the next one, following her instincts and passion.

    Why does she do it?

    I think her story about her pair of bunnies describes the reason why best.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    “Every night at bedtime, I would give Jaja and Bradley a treat maybe at 9:30 I would give it to them out in the hall. I would say, “Bunnies you want your treat,” and they came flying out from underneath the bed. Well one night I’m in the hallway and of course they come flying out from under the bed…wait a minute it’s just Jaja and she puts her brakes on and runs back under the bed. She went back underneath the bed to get Bradley because (since he’s deaf) he didn’t hear me. I thought something was wrong.  Another time, she was in the litter box in the far corner of the room. I would never usually give them pellets in the bedroom but this particular day, I had a couple of pellets in my hand and I gave Bradley a couple of pellets. He ran over to Jaja’s little box to tell her. He jumped in the air and she followed him. How cool is that?”

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    It’s hard not to tell how much Cvetan is passionate about buns. She “gets emotional” when she talks about another one of her bonded rabbit pairs who fell in love at first sight and were inseparable until one of them died when she was 11 years old.

    I love her story because it shows the power of one woman’s determination to spread awareness and education about something she was passionate about. She essentially took her compassion for animals and transferred it to her passion in life. It’s something we can all learn from. In fact, with great enthusiasm she said,  “Brandi, if I can do this, anyone can.”

    Share this:
    Share this page via Email Share this page via Stumble Upon Share this page via Digg this Share this page via Facebook Share this page via Twitter
    Let Your Silly Out

    Let Your Silly Out

    Tweet It’s Friday. And this post is super late. But I have a good reason. I spent my morning doing social media and my afternoon interviewing a few people in the neighborhood for a local article I’m writing. But now that I’ve had a chance […]

    Related Posts with Thumbnails