How to Get Through Life’s Growing Pains

{photo by The Inspiring Bee}

Who we are is always in the process of becoming. Although we might not know it, there is room to grow even in the fullest of blossoms. That’s because sometimes growth means a death, a letting go of who we were in order to become who we were meant to be.

It’s not in easy process, but it’s a worthwhile one.

The difficulty lies in the awareness that we are not yet there. Just like the mountain that impedes our path on a hiking trip or the lack of experience that finds us interrupting our career, our ability to keep going is as necessary as breathing. If we were to stop, to turn back, to give up, that would also be a death, a silent lights out of our dreams.

There are ways we make the process harder. As Iyanla Vanzant said on Oprah’s Life Class:

“Comparison is an act of violence against yourself.”

I’ve done it enough times to know the self-inflicting pain that comes when you compare yourself to others. And it’s never to people who are worse off than you. It’s always to those reaping the benefits of their hard work. We rarely see the struggles people go through to become successful. We see their book deals, high paying dream jobs and easy lifestyle as gifts given to just a handful of people. But they were here too. It just wasn’t exciting enough to land on TV.

So I say to you now and to myself, this is our growing pains. This is not the end of our story. This is a small pebble on a beautiful, but lengthy path. There will come a time when we will celebrate too. But now’s not the time for rejoicing, it’s all about hard work. Moments like these beckon us to believe even when no evidence exists for positive change. It’s a call for faith.

Living in Hawaii hasn’t been easy. Writing jobs are sparse here and writers are aplenty. There have been many times that I’ve thought of giving up. But I remember what it took for me to start from nothing (no writing jobs, no contacts) five years ago and how far I’ve come. When you’re settled and you think you’ve got it covered, life will always hurl you a curve ball. It’s a sign you’re on the right path and on your way to self-growth and change. It can be an opportunity or it can be the beginning of the end of your career.

I’ve taken up watercolor painting recently. First of all, let me start by saying that I pretty much suck at it. But the process of learning it by this lady has re-taught me the importance of trying something even if you’re not good at it. It’s a reminder that we’re all students in this big class called life. Making mistakes, realizing your not good at it, dipping your paintbrush into something unfamiliar, these are all key life lessons. It’s not the end of the world when we fail, when we make a mistake, or when what we do doesn’t make us immediately successful. It’s believing what we’re doing matters and sticking through it even when it feels like it’s not working. True failure is the end anyway. If you’re still working towards your dreams, you haven’t failed yet.

So if you’re comparing yourself to someone more successful, stop right now. Come back to yourself. Be grateful for whatever stage your in. Know that what your doing is worthy and meaningful. And remember that the greatest gift you can offer the world is to genuinely be and give of yourself.

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Pursuing Your Dream Career in a Rotten Economy

{via pinterest; originally weheartit.com.}

I’m getting ready to reveal some big news here. But in the meantime, I wanted to share something short, but hopefully meaningful.

I started this blog a few years ago because I had a profound belief that if every person did what they were born to do, the world would be a happier place. Children would grow up with happier parents. Parents wouldn’t feel resentful and jaded. People might even be kinder to one another because they wouldn’t be living in a repressed state.

When we are free to be who we are, it is like coming home. My hope in writing here was to help free others to live their own dreams, whatever that may be.

While the blog has changed a lot and grown, I still feel strongly about my purpose. When I hear friends and family complain about the bad economy or hear reporters talk about the worsening job market, I try to stay hopeful. I want to rise above the anxiety and fear with hope and blind faith. The only other choice is to believe the worst, immerse ourselves in negativity and consequently sabotage any efforts we have to rise above it.

But I doubted others felt this way. And of all people, I hardly thought financial guru Suze Orman would agree with my thinking. But she went and surprised me.

On her show The Money Class on OWN, she said the following to a mother and military vet who found herself unemployed:

“Why do you want to be a waitress when your dream job is to be a photographer? You should pursue your dreams…a job is not a career, a career is a passion.”

Amen Ms. Orman! It thrills me to no end that she feels this way. Even in a bad economy, you can own a dream and there is no shame in pursuing one. It is not selfish. It is not asking too much. It is something we all deserve-if a dream is as big as Walt Disney’s and if it’s as small as wanting to learn how to be a photographer. Maybe you’re working full-time and still want to be an author or an entrepreneur or a painter. Don’t give up on your dreams! Keep to it. The only sure way you won’t get there is if you give up and never pursue it.

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Finding Inspiration in Individuality: Why You SHOULD Stick Out Like a Sore Thumb

{photo credit}

I was tiny as kid. And very conscious of it. I saw my own shadow and was appalled at how “small” I really was.

I think I was surprised because inside I felt big-HUGE even! My spirit poured out from beyond my childlike body like hot, liquid gold, bright and all glowing.

Yet, my enthusiasm came out in sometimes unkind ways. When I drew grass, for example, I made sure there was dirt below it. A layer of brown crayons and then a shade of green.

And when the other girls pointed and laughed, I argued my side and they fought back. But I stood my ground (no pun intended).

They could make green grass all they wanted. But I insisted that mine’s be brown and green and I would leave it that way.

It was definitely a sign of what was to come-my desire to be an authentic me-to stand out like a sore thumb and be as different as I could possibly me. (My poor mom!)

And to this day, I advocate and have always advocated for others to learn to embrace their uniqueness-to find what makes them brown instead of green and to be as true to themselves as they can be.

While it’s not always easy to stand apart from the crowd, being authentic, being who you were meant to be, is the easiest way to find your true calling in life.

I know for a fact that I could have still been a Research Assistant or an Administrative Assistant if that’s what I wanted to be. But my innate quirkiness, insatiable curiosity and maddening borderline insane desire for creativity, makes me shed sameness and throw my finger up at conformity. Then, out of exhaustion and pure laziness I opted to just accept who I am…warty and all.

Can’t say it’s the easiest path in life. Nor can I say it’s always happy. But in the end, I know who I am, who I love, what makes me happy and why I do what I do. And being able to say that is purely priceless to me.

How about you?

Hi there! Glad you stopped by!

You’ve found one of my blogs on everything inspiring.  I also have one on writing and freelancing tips for new writers and entrepreneurs here. If you are in search of a writer to get all of your words in order, I’d love to work with you!

I am a published writer, blogger, and copywriter that can help you with all of your writing needs. You can find out more about me here.

You can also sign up for my RSS feed, join in the conversation on Facebook or tweet me @TheInspiringBee. I’d love to hear from you! Thanks for finding me!

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Self-Sabotage: Our Dirty Little Secret

Few talk about it. But there’s something dark and lurking in the background of our unsuccessful lives. It’s sabotage. But don’t look at your neighbor, it’s probably you doing the undermining.

Case in point.

When I was a kid, I had an uncanny knack for winning carnival games. I’d win that throw the ring around the soda bottle game or the plastic horse racing one.

But something happened when I got older and self-conscious. Continue reading →

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