Tweet Transformation is one of those words that sounds easier and loftier than change. The latter often beckons its listeners to hide, avoid or escape. Why is change so scary, but transformation seem as elegant as a caterpillar turning into a butterfly? I think because […]
Tweet When I reflect upon the almost 7 years I have been a freelance writer, the biggest hurdle had less to do with my professional experience than my personal struggles. In fact, success often deals with the latter. Of course you need experience, a little […]
I was born a fighter. I think I must have came out of the womb with gloves on. Well except that I was delivered via C-section so maybe I wasn’t quite ready.
I carried this mindset my entire life. It dictated my academics and shot me up from a C-average student to a straight-A’s one.
What that’s led to is a lot of great opportunities and surprising successes. And just as surprising failures.
What I’ve learned in looking back is that it’s not always the fight that wins the battle, but the letting go, surrendering and accepting what is. It’s a great thing to be a fighter. You need someone in your corner to fight for your dreams, to stand up for what’s right, to make a difference. But you need a listener to propel you into the life you were meant to live.
leaning into what is…
When you have an innately fighting personality, you believe with 100% certainty that you can control everything. Your body may be tired. Your soul may be fatigued. But your mind says, “Keep going!” And you listen. What happens over time is that you stop communicating with your intuitive voice. You live on adrenaline to keep going. Eventually, you run on empty and get sick.
It’s the same thing with living your life. I think being a straight A-student gave me the false impression that if I only work really hard, I could get everything I wanted right away. I forgot about ambiguity, faith, the unknown. I forgot about trust.
When you fill up every single space of “what if,” you leave little room for things like magic, mystery, serendipity.
It’s not wrong to go for what you believe in. But you won’t get to your dreams by going on your own. Don’t let your mind drive you all the time. Sharpen your intuition by trusting your instincts and allow your soul to guide you.
The struggle isn’t always the fight. Sometimes it’s about settling in softly into the present moment of the unknown and having the courage to walk patiently without answers, without solutions to your current problem and just be.
Tweet I admit I spend too much time worrying about the things that don’t end up even happening in my life. I worry about wasting time, but much of it is spent obsessing over the illnesses I have and the opportunities I don’t have. Last […]
Tweet Everyone wants a better life. They desire bigger homes with huge lots, more money, a better job. But when it comes down to it. What we’re really after is more love, deeper relationships, a more meaningful life. And you can easily get all of […]
You could, for example, be reclining in a lounge chair, umbrella laced drink in hand, staring into a turquoise hued pool and still be tormented by worries and untamed thoughts.
You could just as easily be sitting in a tiny room packed with physical clutter, assaulted by outside noises and filled with mental claustrophobia.
Either situation can understandably lead one to feel the following statement repeatedly:
“Get me out of here NOW!”
We’ve all been through it. The place where we reside feels to us like a personal attack. We don’t deserve it. We didn’t ask for this. More importantly, how do we escape from this unintentional imprisonment? How do we turn paradise from personal hell?
To push through whatever you’re going through right now, you don’t have to physically move. You can hate where you are and find pockets of peace. That’s how you get toward happiness. Your situation doesn’t necessarily have to change. But you will have to.
“If, amidst the turmoil, you can find just one moment of peace in each day, then your whole life will become more joyful. Like the water in a lake, when your mind is calm, you can see the depths below.” — Ed and Deb Shapiro
It’s no secret that life is hard or that things don’t happen the way we want it to. But the people who exude happiness and joy are the ones that travel further than the silver lining. They work hard to see beyond the vision in front of them. They look for the inspired present-the place just ahead of where they are now.
Feeling stuck too?
What to Do in the Short-Term
Do something about it! If it’s your confining house, toxic roommate, or your noisy neighbor that’s getting to you, make it a point to get out of the house. Immerse yourself in inspiration. Visit a museum, walk to the beach, meditate. And those voices that tell you, “You don’t have time or money to do it?” Tell them to take a hike literally. You’re taking care of yourself. The more time you invest in lifting your spirits, the faster it’ll take to get you away from your current difficult situation into peace.
What to Do in the Long-Term
Your situation can temporarily change once you get yourself out of the rut. But you’re going to have to do something more long-lasting and permanent if you really want to create ripples of positive change. Start by creating a list of what you do want and then write steps on how you’re going to get it. Don’t hold back or censor yourself because you think “it will never happen” or “it’s impossible.” Dreams come true every day. Why? Because someone believed enough in them to follow through.
The bottom line is that nothing lasts forever. No matter how dreadful you feel in this moment, it will pass. In the meantime, don’t make it more torturous than it has to. There is always joy to be had in every dark corner. But remember…it’s up to you to bring the light to the shadows.
Tweet I think one of the greatest obstacles we grapple with is learning how to accept what is instead of moaning and groaning about what we don’t have. It’s like we’re sitting there one hand full of riches and the other hand open full of […]