It sounds like this:
“I hope I lose those last ten pounds.”
“I hope I get my book finished.”
“I hope I figure out what my purpose is.”
I started reading Atomic Habits An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones by James Clear and suddenly real change seemed possible. I didn’t have to hope anymore. There were things I could do to conduct real change.
Clear breaks it down into easy practical steps. There is for example, a two-step process to begin changing your identity. You’re not just trying to write. When you work on your book, you are a writer. So here are the simple steps:
- Decide who you want to be.
- Create habits that provide evidence of this.
Another easy to remember process is his four laws of behavior change. To create positive change, you need to make it obvious, attractive, easy and satisfying. To break a bad habit, you need to make it invisible, unattractive, difficult and unsatisfying.
In terms of making it obvious, Clear has something called,”Habit stacking,” which is kind of fun. This is tagging one action with another so you’re creating a sandwich that helps you remember what to do next. Just like you may change your clothes after you brush your teeth, habit stacking is about creating habits that follow each other.
This is the formula: “After [CURRENT HABIT], I will [NEW HABIT].”
The habit I want to enforce is to read first thing in the morning so my formula would look like this: After I wake up, I will read a few pages of my book.
For you it might look like, after I drink a cup of coffee, I will sit down to write.
Pretty cool huh?
You can create an entire morning and evening routine based on this. I actually think this is a great thing to teach kids.
I’ve already taught my son that after he takes his backpack out the car, he will put in in the house. After he puts away his backpack, he will put his socks in the washing machine.
Kids like routine and it becomes a habit so I don’t even need to remind him. Well, most days.
You can also change your environment to make it easier for you. I leave books next to my nightstand. I could also set up a space for my son for all his things so he knows just where to put it. You might set up your coffee cup next to your laptop or your exercise shoes in your car to motivate you to exercise after work.
Making it attractive is my favorite because it entails rewards. To combat the yuck of having to get yourself to sit in your chair to write, you can set up something fun to get you there. The coffee might to do it. Or if you love watching reality TV but need to exercise, you can plop an exercise machine in front of the television (this is what I do to keep active).
Making it easy is just moving everything in your sight so it’s impossible not to do it. This may look like scheduling time to write or preparing healthy food in advance. You can also enact the two-minute rule which is to shorten the length of time you’ll devote to your habit so it feels doable such as writing or weightlifting for two minutes.
Lastly, making it satisfying is all about creating instant gratification moments to help you in the long haul of making these habits automatic. You can place money in a jar every time you exercise or resist dessert. You can use writing programs that chart your word count. You can get a massage for exercising regularly.
Let’s see how I do. Are you with me?