Posts tagged ‘Fathers and daughters’

June 17th, 2010

A Father's Day Post

Father’s Day is a mere moments away. While I can’t be physically near my father since he’s in another state, I thought I’d post an old article I wrote for him years ago. I hope you’ll enjoy it and have a Happy Father’s Day yourself!

Perhaps the greatest evidence of age comes in comparison to those around you.  When I was big enough to walk, but small enough to need daddy’s hand to hold, the world was still young and so was he and I.  Big hands to cover tiny fingers were what security embodied looked like.  I needed him for support and he willingly obliged.  As I got older, my father would run past me calling me “slowpoke” because I would always fall behind. I remember our weekly walks to the neighborhood park where I would stare at his feet gigantic in comparison to mine.  To walk beside him I needed to take double steps to his one and I thought to myself that I would never be grown up enough to catch up to him.  No matter how fast I walked beside him, he would always be faster.  That’s how fathers should be I thought, forever.

As our pace began to mirror each other, the distance between us also disappeared.  The park that I once built my childhood on had also changed.  When I became an adult, the same park didn’t feel as safe.  It had become the home for the homeless and filled with addicts and graffiti.  Funny how so much can change within one’s lifetime.

As I left my twenties, I began to notice a difference in our walks together.  I was starting to know more about life, through my education, our unshared experiences, by living in other states.  Where once we raced ahead into an unknown future, now our pace grew slower to catch up for him.  His knees hurt he said.  His back was too sore to go on.  And I was the one who said, “We’re almost home” instead of him who used to coach me on.  I could tell that he was frustrated.  Our bodies fail us with age it’s true.  It makes me sad that life goes that way though it is inevitable.

I still walk with my father, side by side.  And I am grateful for all the moments captured in the paces we’ve walked, one step at a time.  I’ve realized, as I got older that it’s not how fast or how far you go, but all the pleasures of the precious moments in between.

February 18th, 2010

The Most Extraordinary Things in Life Are Most Ordinary

I apologize for being MIA as of late. My dad’s been in town from Hawaii and we’ve been hopping from Yosemite to Sonoma to San Francisco, giving “Amazing Race” a run for it’s money.

I did get oodles and oodles of photos and material for my blog. But more on that later.

One of the gifts of my dad’s trip was something I already knew, but had the opportunity to re-learn: Sometimes the most extraordinary moments in life are the most ordinary.

I can honestly say that the memories that give me goosebumps were surprisingly not the snowcapped mountaintops or the view of the bay during sunset. Although both in retrospect could easily bring tears to my eyes.

What actually sticks out in my mind are two rather ordinary moments that happened when we weren’t visiting the sights. Sorry Half Dome and Fisherman’s Wharf. Looks like sitting at home and walking around Trader Joe’s wins this race!

When I think back to the whirlwind of my dad’s visit, I smile when I think of the times we were sitting still instead of racing on. One moment occurred even when I wasn’t in the room.

I was taking a shower and through the running water, heard a simple sound that made me think we could have spent the whole time sitting around. It was the sound of my dad and husband’s laughter. Honestly, that sound was worth more than the 4 hour trip to Yosemite or the museum we waited 2 hours and a mound of kids for.

They were talking over their love of the guitar. My dad sitting on our only guest bed-an air bed from Target and my husband cross-legged on the ground. And the two laughing about simple things like strumming. It was a moment worth its weight in gold. A moment to be treasured.

The second moment was surprisingly even more ordinary than the first one. Walking around Trader Joe’s picking out trail mix and pointing out my favorite chips. There was just something so safe, familiar and touching about the moment. The cashier even offered us a sample of the chocolate chip cookies I was eyeing. Not a scene that would make it to a movie because of its ordinariness, but one I will store away for a rainy day.

Maybe it’s a reminder for all of us to put as much love, attention, focus and energy on celebrating every day not just the so-called big ones.