My ego went a bit crazy today when I wasn’t looking. A friend’s good news sent me in a downward spiral of self-doubt and anguish.
This unnerving reaction of why not me instead of good, happy feelings for them was a good wake up call. I quickly realized this had nothing to do with my friend, their dreams or my failures and everything to do with my own self-acceptance of an unconventional dream.
Then I started thinking:
Should we feel less than if are dreams and goals fit into a different mold from society’s expectations?
That is, if we’re not married by 28, with kids by 30 and at the top of our career at 35, does that somehow make our lives less meaningful than the every man?
I don’t think so. But it took a good dose of talking to my ego to realize something greater was going on. As Martha Beck says in Steering by Starlight,”When something ‘terrible’ is happening to us (from a ‘shallows’ perspective) something wonderful is always being born from the Stargazer’s perspective.”
I think the incident reminded me of the importance of staying true to myself and my life instead of jumping on the bandwagon with only a linear goal. Life is full of possibilities. I don’t need to limit my choices to a A + B = C formula. Unless, of course, I wanted to.
Think of it this way. What would our world be like minus world shifters like Oprah and Walt Disney? Every being’s purpose is different. Some grander than others. I know that I can’t live an authentic life by living small or living the life my family, friends, or society want for me. Big or small, one thing I’ve learned is that living a safe, unconventional life doesn’t serve any of us, least of all the world.
