October 6th, 2009

Three Strikes and You're Out!

Baseballphoto by: Sister72

I’ve been getting a lot of signs lately.  Signs that tell me I’m going in the right direction and signs that have been telling me I need to go on a different path.

Yesterday, for example, I was feeling down and out and doubting my dreams as a writer.  Then, I turned on the TV to Oprah and saw that the theme was, “Don’t Stop Believing” based on the song by Journey.  I also had personal question that was answered when I watched, “The View.”

But I also got more negative signs.  Part of my problem has been, for example, not creating contracts with my clients.  After going through it two times in a row, I finally got it-doh!  I need to start taking responsibility for the life that I am creating.  And part of that is having the courage to ask for what I need.

I began wondering how many of us go through our days with signs coming at us left and right, but fail to hear them, because of fear.  Fear of what others will think of us.  Fear of asking and not getting what we need.  Or even fear of what we will do when we get everything we ask for.

Part of following our dreams requires strength, courage and action.  We cannot sit around idly waiting for them to come true.  We need to take the steps necessary to fulfill them.  Listen to the signs you get externally and internally to know what to do next.

I truly believe that life is magical, that dreams can come true.  But part of that journey is walking that line between who we were and who we want to be.  Part of that path is about taking a deep breath, trusting our instincts and then making a decision to follow the life of our dreams.

October 5th, 2009

My favorite quotes from Julie & Julia…

If I haven’t already done a good enough of job of proving why Julie & Julia is more about life than cooking, read a few of my favorite quotes from the book:

“Julia taught me what it takes to find your way in the world…I thought it was all about…confidence or will or luck.  But there’s something else, something that these things grow out of.  It’s joy.” (Powell, 305)

“I didn’t understand for a long time, but what attracted me to MtAoFC was the deeply buried aroma of hope and discovery of fulfillment in it.  I thought I was using the Book to learn to cook French food, but really I was learning to sniff out the secret doors of possibility.” (Powell, 305-306).

October 5th, 2009

Inspiring Books: Julie & Julia

Julie & JuliaSome days it’s easy to love life.  Work is great.  Family’s great.  Weekends are filled with sunny, fun days ahead.  Other days it’s not so easy.  Call it your savage, untamed hair day.  I like to say it’s my crazy hair day.  The ones that resemble Monica’s frizzy hairdo in the Friend’s episode that took place in Barbados.  Well that’s how some days are like.  Wild and barbaric, and hard to control.

I’m having one of those days.  My latest battle is with difficult publishers-those you have to chase in order to get them to pay you and it’s not fun.  That’s why I’m in desperate need for inspiration.  Thank goodness for Julie Powell’s book Julie & Julia.  While I love food and cooking, I can’t say that I’m a food snob, nor have I ever watched an episode of Julia Child or read her cookbook.  But the jewel of this fast read is more about the author’s fiery passion for reaching her dreams than the fiery meals she cooks in the kitchen.  I’m envious of her pure focus and goal.  One that needs no explanation and rarely leaves room for doubt.

As I trek on this road to pursue my own dreams, I am continuously inspired by Julie Powell and her seemingly insane goal of cooking her way through 524 recipes in Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking in one year!  Not because the feat was awe-inspiring (which it was) but because from an idea as small as a seed she grew an insane garden filled with possibility and in it her life’s dream.  Can you imagine how many obstacles one might have while attempting to fulfill such a goal?

Perhaps what is most inspirational is the fact that she kept to it without any expectation that her idea would blossom into a full outright writing career.  She sacrificed sleep, house cleanliness and many peaceful nights with her husband but in the end gained more from the challenge than she ever imagined.  From one aspiring writer to another, I’d ask her, “How’d you do it Julie?  How’d you keep to your dreams even when you felt like throwing in the kitchen towel?”  As for me, I can only hope to get whisked away on a similar adventure, one that will take me just one step closer to my dreams of being a writer.

What about you?  Any inspiring reads lately?

Oh and check out this video that shows a little bit about the real Julie Powell.

October 2nd, 2009

My Story

Open doorA friend asked me recently how I find the inspiring people I’ve interviewed here.  I think it’s really all about soul sisters Faith and Fate.  When I first started blogging in 2004, 5 years ago, I did it because the people I knew then were doing it.  Though I started writing since I was 6, I was a bit wary of going online and sharing my thoughts with the world.  But I did, eventually.

My first blog was all about me.  My personal thoughts about navigating my way through my twenties.  A newspaper editor who read it said I sounded like him when he was that age.  So yeah it was more of an online diary than anything else.

I later moved on to blogging professionally when I lucked out and scored a job at Tiny Prints, an online stationery store.  Although I didn’t know it at the time, my experience writing for them and their sister site Wedding Paper Divas would help catapult me into copywriting, web writing, blogging and ultimately the freelance writing world.

On an interview once, I received the most valuable advice ever from the interviewee.  He said, “I believe that whatever job we take now should be a stepping stone to what we really want to do in the future.”  For me this was a revelation.  Previously, I was job hopping without considering my dreams. From then on, I decided I was going to stop floating and get anchored in my writing.  Although I’ve taken the odd job here and there for money, I’ve still held on.

I might be only a pebble closer to my dreams but I’m comforted in knowing that at least I’m doing it.  I’m creating my own reality.  The people I’ve found on my journey came out of nowhere just because I opened myself up to possibility.  I’m actually on Martha Beck’s second book following, “Following Your Own North Star” called “Steering by Starlight.”  And it’s all about the magic that happens when you have the courage to life in.  I think too many people are scared of disappointment, afraid of not being worthy of their dreams.

The truth is.  The fact that we are here means that we’ve already encountered a life’s worth of struggle and hardship.  There’s a reason why we’ve had to endure it.  Everyone has a purpose in life.  Everyone has a dream.  Believe in yourself and know that what makes you unique is invaluable to the world.  Share your dreams with others and open the door to the possibility that life is a lot more magical than it seems.

I did.  And that’s the long winded answer to how I have so much amazing people on this blog to share their inspirational stories with.  How about you?  What’s your story?

September 30th, 2009

How Disneyland's Autopia Ride is Like Your Life

Autopia ridephoto by www.ericcastro.biz

A few posts ago, I wrote an entry entitled, “Staying the Course.”  It was about staying motivated and determined at a gradual pace while mucking through the un-fun parts of following your dreams.  Today though I had a thought.

What if we’re not even trekking on that path?  What if we can’t stay the course because we haven’t even found the right one to start treading on?

Ever go to Disneyland? Well if you’ve been a loyal reader of my little blog, you know that Disneyland isn’t just the happiest place on earth it’s MY happiest place on earth.  That’s how I ended up finding an analogy about life and D.L.

Have you ever rode the autopia ride? You know the one that is close enough to being like a real car to make every little kid who can’t drive excited about driving what they think is “the real thing.”  It’s also the ride that makes young adults who know how to drive also stand in line because it’s totally not the same thing.

Well, I have memories about that ride.  When I was a child, I took the driver’s seat and my grandpa, bless his heart, had the courage to be my passenger.  I learned quickly that there was no real freedom involved since the car was on a track.  When I turned the steering wheel too much to the right or left, the car hit the track and pushed us back on course.  On top of the car jerking back and forth, I also had my grandpa scolding me to, “stay on course!”

Why am I telling you this story? Well this is what I think-if we believe that we haven’t found the right path to the right relationship, the right job, the right life, we’ve been mislead.  I think that like autopia, there is an invisible track keeping us on course.  We’re just oblivious to the subtle jerks that tell us we’re going the wrong way.  Maybe if we wait too long, the signs get bigger and louder, kind of like my grandpa’s voice when I’m getting too far off the track.

So what’s it to you?  Here’s a clue.  If you meet a new guy and he starts talking about his ex-girlfriend, that’s a jerk (pun intended).  Or if you’re offered a job and your stomach starts to turn when you think about it, that’s another jerk.  Every time you do something that causes a reaction, think carefully about it and ask yourself why it’s happening.  Your inner autopia may be directing you to a more authentic life-one that matches up with the true path towards your dreams.

September 29th, 2009

Dealing with "What If…"

Treat yourselfAs I’m writing this post, there’s a lot of “what ifs” going on in my mind.  What if, for example my husband loses his job.  Or what if, I won’t make it as a writer.  I’m sure I’m not the only one with what ifs running around my head these days.  The economy.  The uncertainty.  The evening news.  There are more than enough reasons to pull your hair out these days and all our legit.

But even in times of despair, there are still things we can do to prevent an outright catastrophic breakdown.  Read them along with me as I try to follow my own advice:

Find the silver lining.  This might be a good time to break out that new journal you got.  Start listing down at least 3 things every night that you are grateful for.  Oprah says that even on the worst days, the fact that you are breathing is a blessing.

Take a deep breath.  Try meditating even for 5 minutes or just take a deep breath.  Feeling your breath in your body may help to refocus your attention.

Express yourself.  Go out with your friends, talk to your significant other or write about your worries in a journal.  Expressing yourself may help alleviate or help identify some of your fears.

Treat yourself.  Do something nice for yourself.  Drink a cup of hot cocoa or tea or take a warm bubble bath.  Be a kid again and indulge in a bit of fun just for the day.

Get outside.  Being in nature is so healing.  Take a walk outdoors, go hiking or bicycling and enjoy the peace that comes with feeling the wind on your face.

Spend time with kids or a pet.  Kids and animals help bring you to the present moment.  And a lot of times stress comes from worrying about what will happen in the future and regretting things that happened in the past.  When life gets you down, spend some time with them and experience the blessing of present moment living.

If all else fails, remember a time when things were really hard in your life.  Think about how you handled the situation and what came out of it.  There is usually a gift in every seemingly difficult experience.  We just need both the patience and the faith to help us get to the other side.

September 24th, 2009

Staying the Course

Hawaii HikingPart of life’s challenge is staying happy in midst of struggle.  Pardon me while I use another hiking analogy.  Imagine you are on a rough trail with the heat beating down your back and the sun piercing your eyes.  Do you take a deep breath and enjoy the ride or do you speed up?

If you ask me, I’d try to get to the end as soon as possible.  The process is not enjoyable for me.

But neither is tolerating difficulty, boredom, uncertainty and the other valleys in our lives.

Our struggle is fighting the urge to rush to get to the top.  Maybe it’s an internal desire in us to believe that “bigger is better” or that winners are somehow more worthy than losers.  Whatever it is, sometimes we’re too much in a hurry to achieve greatness to be appreciative of what’s going on in the meantime.

Let’s role play for a minute.  I’ll imagine you asked me, “What’s the worst that can happen by wanting better for myself?”

Well like adrenaline, when there’s a right amount, you actually do better.  Adrenaline and dreaming of success are motivating.

But on the other hand, sometimes wanting too much too soon can have the opposite effect-it can be paralyzing.  Losing 20 pounds, for example, feels overwhelming but having a goal of losing a pound of week seems more doable.

This is why it’s better to do one small thing than to wait for a life changing moment to take action.  If you want to be a successful paid blogger, for example, start small by trying it out as a hobby before you quit your day job.  Or if you’re anxious for your small business to be a big success, focus first on your products and company before you decide to branch out to bigger and better things.

Every thing has its time and place.  Sometimes we try to rush our experience because the not knowing, or the feeling like we might never accomplish our dreams scares us and either paralyzes us or pushes us too quickly into unknown territory.

The cure?

Start small.  Take every moment as it comes.  Dream big but pursue it with baby steps.  You want to know how to get to the top?  Put one foot in front of the other and over time you will eventually get there.  Just be patient, wait and see!

September 21st, 2009

Taking Reader Requests

Since this week is showing itself to be a busy one, I decided to feed two birds with one bread (a.k.a. kill two birds with one stone).  I’m taking up a suggestion from one 2inspired reader Bridget by keeping this one short and sweet and by following an friend’s email challenge she sent today.  So here goes:

In honor of World Gratitude day, I’m taking part in my friend Lea’s Gratitude Challenge.  This means for 21 days I’m going to take note of all the things in my life that I have to be grateful for (something tells me that there will be a lot). You can download the Gratitude Challenge calendar on the website or be like Oprah and write about it in a daily gratitude journal.  I’m opting for the latter.

Anyway, in honor of World Gratitude Day, what do YOU have to be grateful for?
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHxlXLDMG0Q&hl=en&fs=1&]

September 15th, 2009

Free Your Fears and Let Your Inspiration Soar

I’ve been procrastinating-fingers numb, heart tingling, and palms sweating whenever I think about this subject.  I’ve been postponing writing about it since I returned from Hawaii several weeks ago.  But the fear has been holding me hostage.  Inspiration has been drying up and all of a sudden I started wondering where did my passion go?

Did you ever see “Something’s Gotta Give?”  Well if you haven’t seen it yet, I recommend you rent it (or wait for it on TV-TBS plays it like every few weeks).  You aspiring writers out there will get a heart flutter or at least a good chuckle at Diane Keaton’s emotional vulnerability.  I for one LOL every time I see it even though I’ve watched it at least 5 times.

The part that gets me is watching how she uses her passion (in this case her heartbreak from Jack Nicholson’s character) and throws it into her work like fuel to the fire.  Believe me when I say it’s a beautiful thing to watch.

Her courage is her ability to let go and fully experience pain which is both heartbreaking and heartwarming because it is so indicative of what it means to be human.  I admire that.  And the result was that she was able to create her best written work yet.

Whenever we try to quell the flame by burying our pain via alcohol, drugs, food denial, (you name your addiction), or as Alanis Morissette said in her huge cult following song You Learn, “Swallow it down, what a jagged little pill,” we also kill inspiration, passion and our poor muse with it.  Our desire to cover our fears by denying them also takes a toll on our dreams.

How do I know?

Well I’m sitting here typing away at 10 ’til 11 pm, no closer to writing the topic that I’m afraid of writing about let alone think about.

What’s the topic?

If I could write it, it would be written.  It’s between me, my keyboard and my fear of experiencing what the story will do to me.

I know eventually I will get there-mostly because it has to be written.  But I wonder how much of us sacrifice our life’s purpose because we are afraid of what that change will bring.

If you are feeling stuck like me, you might be wondering what’s up?  Is it writer’s block?  Mid-life crisis?  It could be that your emotions are stuck.  It’s kind of like playing a video game but getting stuck at the same level.  You may need to experience something different, learn a lesson, feel your fears, have a good cry or find a new path to get unstuck to get yourself courageously on to the next level.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nhv81QCDzLo]

September 14th, 2009

Dreaming and Growing

There are developmental stages for growth such as childhood, adolescence, adulthood and late adulthood.  As a grad student in Counseling Psychology, I’m pretty familiar with them.  Yet, I didn’t realize that the growing continues even while pursuing your dreams.

I came up with my own version specifically for those following their dreams.  Here are the life stages of dreaming according to me:

Infancy:  The birth of your dreams.  This early stage is all about discovering who you are and what you want to do with the rest of your life.  It can come at any age (age is truly just a number here) and can inspire great change.

Childhood: The fun part.  So you’ve quit that life draining 9 to 5 and bought the business cards. This stage is all about play, exploring and delving deeper into the best parts of living your dreams.

Adolescence: Reality hits.  Rebellion sets in.  Questions such as, “What did I do?”  And, “Should I really have quit my day job?” keeps you up at night.  You start to doubt yourself and your decisions.  Or you begin to ask deeper questions such as, “What kind of writer do I want to be?”  This stage is necessary for discovering your true purpose, getting you clear about what specifically you want to do and how you will get there.  It also helps you gain courage, strength and self-motivation.  You’ll need it.

Adulthood: You feel more confident, have more freedom and you are beginning to revel in the fruits of your labor.  Yet, there are still challenges up ahead.  You’re just better prepared.

Later adulthood:  You’ve got the experience, the success and stay ability to know that you can fulfill your dreams.  At this point, you may have returned to infancy many times, pursuing various other new dreams.  You may also have a strong desire to help others by using your business, skills and experience to mentor or assist them in fulfilling their own dreams.

What stage of dreaming are you on?

Venice