July 24th, 2009

Preventing Dream Burn Out

Dream chasing can be exhausting. For one, it’s like going after that unattainable pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. The faster you run, the farther away it gets until it’s out of reach. The one big worry when you attempt to fulfill your dreams? You’ll run out of gas, right before you get to the end.

To prevent dream burn out, read these helpful remedies.

  1. Celebrate all of your victories, even the seemingly minor ones. A compliment? New blog viewers/customers? An email from a potential client? Take time to do a little, “Yay me!” whenever anything good happens to you. It’s so easy to keep pushing ahead but it’s important to treasure all the good things that are happening to you right now!
  2. Practice patience. If only we could all make our dreams come true with the snap of our fingers and the wave of a magic wand. But in reality, dreams take time to come to life. Remember that every thing comes in due time. Take a deep breath and reflect on what you want for your future and what you need now until then.
  3. Learn gratitude. A part of celebrating the good things is learning to appreciate them as well. It may be harder on some days than others to find something to be grateful for but learning gratitude is essential to your well-being now and in the future.
  4. Take a break. There will always be more ___ that needs to be done. Press pause when you need to and remember even the most successful people take breaks.
  5. Remember where you have been. When you remember what you have been through and all the challenges you have faced thus far, the road ahead seems less daunting. Recall the past mountains you have already climbed and charge ahead revitalized by the strength and courage of your past.

There will always be challenges in front of us, more projects to tackle and people to compete with who want the same things. The best thing we can do for our dreams? Invest in ourselves.

New York

July 23rd, 2009

Birthday Break

Today I’m taking a birthday break. While I will enjoy my special day, click over to not2shabby to celebrate by winning a free gift, my treat.

Birthday Cake

July 22nd, 2009

Facing the Music

One of the greatest challenges to success is facing ones fears. You’ll notice it’s a reoccurring theme in my blog and seen here in my previous interview with Life Coach Jaqui Duvall. The real question then, is why are we so scared of success?

On LiveStrong.com and in a post titled, “Handling Fear of Success,” licensed psychologist James J Messina talks to Jake Lawson about what those fears are and why they prevent us from success.  Some of the reasons such as the fear of not being good enough, fear of not being happy once we achieve our goals and fear of being recognized when we do well, sound all too familiar to me. When someone compliments my writing, for example, I’m always scrounging around for words of critique versus praise.

But why? Why do we do this to ourselves? Isn’t the goal in life to be happy, to succeed, to accomplish all of our dreams? When we play video games or board games, how often are we worried about these same fears? We seldom think that we don’t deserve to win. But in the game of life, why is that we take ourselves out of the race, even before the competition has really begun?

It may be those self-sabotaging beliefs that motivated our actions as children such as, “nobody likes a winner” or “it’s best not to stand out from the crowd.” It could also be a deep, underlying belief that we are somehow unworthy of success because who are we really?!

The solution? Although there’s no easy solution, there are hope and love. Hope allows you to believe that dreams are possible and love involves loving yourself enough to believe that you can. Not everyone can make it to the top, but I truly believe that everyone deserves the chance to get there.

At the top of the mountain

July 17th, 2009

Exciting News!

It’s hard to believe it’s been a week since I decided to go full-time as a freelancer! It’s been bliss!  There’s also a lot of exciting things that’s been happening. Starting this coming Monday check out a new feature to this blog and you’ll want to tune in next Thursday at not2shabby for sure!

July 16th, 2009

Harry Potter Made Me Believe

I was lucky enough to catch the latest Harry Potter late last night.  It was the best one yet!  Lots of actions, excitement, humor and even a few love stories added to the mix.  

The thing that really got me about this one was how scary it was.  I had to close my eyes to get through some of the scenes.  My reaction got me thinking about how much they resemble my personal fears.  They too sometimes make me want to squeeze my eyes shut especially when there’s no magic wand to make it all go away.

So how do we deal with our fears?  

Well in reality, we can either run and hide or face them head on.  Though we might not have a wand to make them disappear, we do have the courage to defeat them.  We are a lot stronger than our fears and a whole lot more powerful.

In fact, there’s no need for a cape, super powers, or magic to get us through even the scariest moments in our lives.  All it takes is having the courage to believe…belief in ourselves and our dreams.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood PrincePhoto from the WashingtonPost.com.

July 13th, 2009

My Worst Fear Comes True

When you’re slaving a way at your stable 9 to 5, not much really scares you.  Life is often boringly easy.  Maybe that’s why we stay in it so long.  Having a paycheck come in every few weeks becomes a luxury when we take that leap from desk job to the job of our dreams.

As I transition from corporate life to being a full-time freelancer, I’m realizing how scary and exhilarating making that jump is.  I thought just entering the field was terrifying enough but there are many, equally scary steps along the way.  

For me it was my fear of my tape recorder not working in an important interview I had scheduled.  I did everything I could to prevent my fear from happening.  I brought a dozen batteries and two tape recorders and tested both three times before I went.  And guess what?  Both didn’t work!  

What I got instead was a lesson learned.  We can prepare but we can’t control life.  Even when your worst case scenario becomes a reality, life goes on. Embrace the fear, and you’ll find that you receive more than you lose.  So I didn’t get the entire conversation on tape.  Instead I took good notes, listened well and made a connection with the interviewee.  And most importantly I learned not to allow my fear to get the best of me.    

Florence


July 8th, 2009

Some Comic Relief

The economy.  MJ.  Global warming.  Sometimes we all need some comic relief. In yesterday’s post, I wrote about staying positive as a way to help get you through the rough spots in the path toward your dreams.  Well here’s a video that should provide at least some temporary bouts of guffaws and laughter. Perfect for the middle of the week.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHiqVygN-w0&hl=en&fs=1&]

July 7th, 2009

In the meantime, in between time

Sometimes you know where you want to be but you just can’t get there yet.  You might be working at a job you hate or in a relationship that’s not working. That’s okay.  You can still get to your dream and live in the moment now, no matter how sucky that now might be.  

The time between now and then may seem like eons away.  When you’re staring at the gold at the end of the rainbow but you’re standing under some gray clouds and rain, your present moment may not seem as dreamy as you’d wish it to be.  

So what do you do to stay focused on your far away dreams?

Stay positive.  Watch funny movies.  Call your funny friends.  And remember to surround yourself with as much positivity as you can stand.  It’s going to be rough in the meantime, so at least have some fun along the way.

Stay present but remain focused on the goal.  Some days may be harder than others to get through the day.  When I was feeling stuck at my 9-5 job, I used my lunch hour to read books on following my dreams and strategized how I would get there.  I had a plan and a timeline.  This helped me to stay focus on my future goals and prevented me from getting overwhelmed by the difficulties of daily life.

Try to find the silver lining.  Maybe your job, relationship, etc. isn’t the greatest, but you’re going through it for a reason.  Try to figure out what this situation is trying to teach you so that you can learn from the situation.

In the meantimes are always rough.  I know because I’ve had my share.  Remember to be kind to yourself during this time and know that like everything else, “this too shall pass.”

July 6th, 2009

The "I'm Not Worthy" Syndrome

It was made funny by Dana Carvey in SNL’s favorite sketch “Wayne’s World,” but in reality feeling unworthy is anything but funny.  Whether it’s money, success or happiness that we’re fearing, why is it that we often deny ourselves what really want out of the fear that we’re unworthy of it?

Oftentimes when I’m hitting the online job ads, I automatically look for qualifications and skills that I don’t have versus what I do.  Somehow it’s an easy way for me to eliminate jobs.  Yet, even when I find gigs that I’m qualified for I tend to second guess myself.  And what’s left?  Jobs I’m overqualified for.  Sure those are easy to get, but they’re not so fun to maintain.  More importantly, they are most likely unchallenging and unworthy of you, your time, skills and energy.

So what’s the antidote to the I’m not worthy syndrome?  Take a shot of confidence, a dose of courage and a drop of hope and then take a deep breath and do it anyway.  The thing is that even the most successful person you admire didn’t start off that way.  Everyone experiences that moment when they doubt who they are and if they can really make it.  

The difference between them and us?  They took a chance and believed that they could.  So the next time you feel insecure, unsure and unworthy, remember this one thing: pretend that you are already the person you’ve always wanted to be.  Imagine you are successful, amazing, and totally worthy.  Chances are, you already are!

Carmel

July 2nd, 2009

Are you a cat or a dog?

My co-worker yesterday told me that he was half-cat.  Knowing he wasn’t crazy, I asked him to clarify.  He said he lived life thinking that he had at least 3 more to go.  “Ah!” I said.  Now I get it.  I told him, “Well I’m a dog then.  Cause I live life like I only have one.”  

How do you live your life?  

Are you still waiting for life to happen to you?  Feel like you have forever and a day to make that dream come true?  For all we know, we only have one life so we might as well live it to the fullest. 

A dog's life